I’ve been in a funk lately. It is winter here in New England. We haven’t had much snow and the days have been warmer than usual, often in the 30’s rather than single digits but it’s been gray. I am a person who likes color, sunshine and beaches. Instead the trees are bare, the grass is brown and I step carefully on the sidewalk and watch out for black ice. I remind myself that every thing passes and remember every moment is precious including this one. I tell people, you must acknowledge what is true—even if you don’t like it—and I don’t like feeling the heavy stickiness of funk. I don’t like that I’ve had a cold and it is lingering. I am wearing three layers of clothing and have unearthed my sun lamp from the closet. I turn it on. It’s called a “happy light”. I am glad I remembered that I have it and it can be cheering. When my mood matches the weather I have to put extra effort into remembering how blessed I am and really take it in so the words are felt in my body. It’s too easy to ignore what is truly important: being healthy and having a warm house to live in, food to eat, and a loving husband and friends.
The word mindfulness is derived from a Pali word, “sati”, that connotes wisdom and includes remembering. Remembering perspective, remembering compassion, remembering all thoughts and feelings pass. Remembering that as I write the funk is changing and I can’t talk myself out of what I am feeling but I can be kind to myself and not perseverate about it. How wonderful when the mood passes. I remember mindfulness cultivates patience and a willingness to let be and let go. I can’t push the mood away but when my husband returned home and said, “Do you want to go out for some dinner or call it in?” I was interested and focused on where to go and what to eat. We are home now and it’s time for bed. My pajamas are comfortable. My bed is welcoming and my belly full. Funk dissipated. Ah.